Merryn went to daycare and came home very happy. She really loves it there. I asked her if she had a good day and she said enthusiastically, "YES!" Then she named all her friends: "Lilah! Zoe! Jack! Colin!" She made a little nest for herself to sleep on instead of on her bed. She has such a plaintive, sweet little voice.
So we always remember this, our bedtime routine: she brushes her teeth, I change her diaper and put on her pajamas, she gets her pacifier, we read a story (or more than one, or the same one more than once). Then I put her blankies on her, and turn the lights down. I sit at the end of her bed and she puts her feet on my leg. If James is with us, I nurse him. I sing to them. First, "Distant Melody" from the Peter Pan musical, then "Cielito Lindo" and "Amazing Grace". After that, "Sweet Baby James." Then more by request from Merryn...twinkle twinkle, Rudolph, "kissmis" song, "a b song".
I have been doing well on my resolutions. I ran on the treadmill today. Getting a little faster. Went back to my (marriage) counselor Paula Heller today after three weeks. Good...but her advice always seems to be "appease him..." (Not in those words...) and avoid a fight. Not sure how I feel about that...
But, generally things have been pretty peaceful with JJ lately...I am still frustrated by not knowing much about our finances. And I wish for more of a connection. Every day I ask how his day went and he says "good" in the same tone of voice. And no matter what I cook, he says "it's all right" in a flat, sort of disappointed tone. But I think he is actually trying to say it is good; you just wouldn't know that from his tone.
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